You’re ambitious, driven, and brimming with big goals. You have a clear vision for the life you want to create—whether it’s advancing in your career, improving your health, nurturing meaningful relationships, or pursuing a personal passion project. You know the strategies: your goals are S.M.A.R.T, broken down into actionable steps, and backed by a solid plan with well-defined milestones. You’re ready. You start strong.
But then, as January gives way to the everyday demands of life, the momentum slows. Unexpected tasks crop up, your energy shifts to firefighting, and those meaningful goals—the ones you promised yourself you’d prioritize—start slipping to the bottom of the list.
It’s a frustrating pattern, isn’t it? You start with such clarity and drive, yet sustaining that progress often feels like an uphill battle. For many high achievers, this disconnect between intention and execution isn’t about ability or effort—it’s about accountability.
Why We Struggle with Accountability for Personal Goals
“You can count on me, and I’m counting on you to count on me.“
—An Obliger
Gretchen Rubin’s research on how people respond to expectations sheds light on this struggle. According to her framework, we all fall into one of four tendencies: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Each tendency explains why we sometimes take action and other times fall short.
Curious about where you fit? Take Rubin’s quick 5-minute quiz.
The largest group by far—41% of people, including many of my clients—are Obligers. These are the people who excel at meeting external expectations—you want them on your team because you know you can count on them to deliver. The flip side? They often struggle when it comes to following through on their own internal goals and expectations.
If you’re an Obliger, you’ll happily commit to a 6 p.m. walk with a friend because you don’t want to let them down. But if your friend cancels, chances are that walk won’t happen. Obligers thrive when someone else is counting on them. Their internal motto might be, “You can count on me, and I’m counting on you to count on me.”
If this sounds like you, it’s no surprise that having an accountability partner can be a game-changer.
What Is an Accountability Partner?
An accountability partner is someone who helps you stay focused and committed to your goals. Think of them as a combination of coach and trusted guide—someone who has your best interests at heart but isn’t afraid to challenge you to push past excuses and reach your full potential.
But effective accountability goes beyond simply sharing your goals with someone and meeting up for an occasional coffee to chat about them. Success comes from having a structured system in place to track progress and adapt to challenges along the way. Research supports this structured approach: a U.S. study found that sharing your goal with someone increases your likelihood of success by 65%. Pair that with regular, planned check-ins with a trusted partner, and your chances skyrocket to 95%.
How likely you are to take action and succeed
- Have an idea or a goal – 10%
- Consciously deciding that you will do it – 25%
- Deciding when you will do it – 40%
- Planning how to do it – 50%
- Committing to someone that you will do it – 65%
- Having a specific accountability appointment – 95%
How accountability drives sustainable success
Ask any high performer how they reached the top, and they’ll tell you it wasn’t just their individual effort—it was the support system around them. While the spotlight might be on the person who completed the heroic feat, it doesn’t take long to realize that they wouldn’t have succeeded on their own. Take Diana Nyad, who swam 180 km from Cuba to Florida on her fifth attempt at the age of 64. While swimming is typically a solo sport, she had a team of 35 people supporting her every stroke, encouraging her when the journey got tough. Whenever she grew weary, someone was there to remind her what was at stake, motivating her to push forward, one kilometre at a time.
Top achievers don’t rely solely on willpower or brute strength. They understand that success is built on the right mix of focus, consistency, and, most importantly, support. The right accountability partner is like Nyad’s support team—there to keep you grounded and help you stay on course when the path gets challenging. Each check-in is like a pit stop, offering you the opportunity to catch your breath, adjust your strategy, and refocus on the next step. When the journey gets tough, they remind you why you started and keep you on course, helping you push past the limits you once thought you had.
The ultimate goal? To build habits and lasting behaviour change so that the system becomes second nature. A great accountability coach works to make themselves redundant. Not only will you achieve the specific goal you set out to tackle, but you’ll also develop the skills and confidence to move forward with any future goal. It’s about strengthening the “goal achievement muscle” for life.
Accountability: The Missing Ingredient For Personal Pursuits
“Where there is no accountability there will also be no responsibility.” – Sunday Adelaja
Accountability can be the missing ingredient in your pursuit of personal and professional success. By understanding your own tendencies and leveraging the power of an accountability partner, you’re not just setting goals—you’re setting yourself up for lasting, sustainable growth.
Remember, the key isn’t just setting clear goals; it’s about putting a solid system in place with someone who will help keep you on track. Having a trusted guide through the inevitable challenges will make all the difference in maintaining momentum and turning your aspirations into reality. In our next article, we’ll dive deeper into what to look for when choosing an accountability partner.
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About the author
Josie Askin, CEO of Spring Coaching, is a performance and productivity coach who works with driven leaders and entrepreneurs to improve their performance and productivity.
Josie has nearly 20 years working in government, in a range of advisory roles. She became interested in the gaps between workplace performance and wellbeing, gradually building analogies between sport and business performance while gaining several coaching qualifications. Now she deals with clients under pressure from all walks of life offering tailored leadership performance coaching, workplace wellbeing programmes, workshops, speaking and facilitation.